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Just Plain Fun

Horoscopes for December 8, 2011

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If today is your birthday: It’s your birthday!!!  You will need to accomplish all of your goals before your next birthday.  Just a warning. Capricorn (December 22 – January 20) Sometimes you run before you crawl.  Today is one of those days.  You’ll be running to the bathroom before you’ll be crawling back into the bed. Aquarius (January 21 – February 18) You will need to recharge your batteries.  The ones you put in your spouse’s shock collar are beginning to wear down. Pisces (February 19 – March 20) You will be called on multiple occasions by people who are laughing uncontrollably.  They’ve all see that viral video of you picking your nose on YouTube. Aries (March 21 – April 19) Have some fun.  Go to the toy section and set up a battle with all of the various action figures.  When people walk by, point at the action figures and scream “ATTACK!” Taurus (April 20 – May 20) Today is a matter of mind over matter.  As long as you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter. Gemini (May 21 – June 20) We know you’re a prankster, but switching the signs on the restroom doors is a bit much. Cancer (June 21 – July 22) You will be hit by a shopping cart while at the grocery.  The person who pushes the cart into you will run away while humming the theme to Mission: Impossible.  Blame Tom Cruise. Leo (July 23 – August 22) DSDD=  Different Santa, Different Day. Virgo (August 23 – September 22) You will lose multiple games of solitaire before you discover that you’re playing with a deck of only 51 cards.  You are missing the 2 of clubs. Libra (September 23 – October 22) When lunchtime comes to a close, set up a booth and offer to valet park your co-workers cars. It’s a great way to earn some extra cash, and we all know that you are in need of it. Scorpio (October 23 – November 21) Eat.  Sleep.  Exercise.  Repeat.   Oh yeah.. don’t forget to add BATHE! Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21) You lost ten pounds, but the people in line behind you can see where they went.]]]]> ]]>

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