Horoscopes for November 6, 2011

If today is your birthday: It’s your birthday!!!  You will harken back to when things were simpler…  ahhh… yesterday was beautiful, wasn’t it? Capricorn (December 22 – January 20) Sooner or later, you’ll be the window, but today,  you’re the bug. Aquarius (January 21 – February 18) You will find all the advice you need by watching the original Karate Kid and listening to Mr. Miyagi. Pisces (February 19 – March 20) A talking cricket will keep you up later tonight. Aries (March 21 – April 19) You forgot to set your clock back.  It’s an hour earlier than you thought it was! Taurus (April 20 – May 20) People will not believe you when you tell them the truth, so make up some huge lie so they’ll accept the truth.  Tell them you were abducted by aliens and were a guest in the alien emperor’s suite or something like that.  It should work. Gemini (May 21 – June 20) Your existence will be made exciting when you find money on the ground.  Be careful though, it’s considered bad luck if you pick a quarter up if it’s lying heads down. Cancer (June 21 – July 22) WOW… That felt good.  Sorry if it didn’t smell as good as it felt!!! Leo (July 23 – August 22) Friends don’t let friends use flip phones. Virgo (August 23 – September 22) We understand that you are working for the weekend.  We just want to know what you define as the weekend, because it’s Sunday and everyone else kinda assumes that this is a weekend day. Libra (September 23 – October 22) Turn your head and, baby, just spit me out! Scorpio (October 23 – November 21) You will spend most of the day trying to do the impossible:  Licking your own elbow. Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21) Snack well.]]]]> ]]>