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Just Plain Fun

Horoscopes for October 19, 2011

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If today is your birthday: It’s your birthday!   You will try to justify eating your entire cake in one night. Nobody will buy any of the lines you are trying to sell though. Capricorn (December 22 – January 20) Help a stranger in need. If you don’t, they will just push you down and take your change anyway. Aquarius (January 21 – February 18) Contrary to popular belief, popular belief is typically wrong. Pisces (February 19 – March 20) Help yourself to some ice cream at dinner. Heck, have ice cream for dinner. Aries (March 21 – April 19) Expand your mind today. The rest will follow. Taurus (April 20 – May 20) We recommend you secede. Surely your wife will not charge you too much doodie tax for sharing the bathroom. Gemini (May 21 – June 20) Copy the guy next to you. Somebody must have the right answers and that’s a good starting point. Cancer (June 21 – July 22) You boss is beginning to question your maturity level. Better lay off the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. It wouldn’t be so bad if you didn’t cry cause your mommy left the crusts on. Leo (July 23 – August 22) This will never work. Virgo (August 23 – September 22) The answer is cranberries. It always was cranberries. Libra (September 23 – October 22) Your face will stick that way today. After all of these years of anticipation, you will finally get your wish. Scorpio (October 23 – November 21) Nobody will be able to stop you today! Shoulda had your brakes checked when the light kept coming on. Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21) Make the most of a bad situation. You can clean the kitchen floors really thoroughly since you’ll get stuck there later.]]]]> ]]>

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